A Thank You to the Chengdu CWI

In lieu of presents for both Jack's birthday and a "Welcome Home, Jack" party held at my office, Chris and I requested that our families and friends instead provide new clothing to be donated to the Chengdu Children's Welfare Institute (CWI) where Jack was raised from the time he was a few months old until he came home to us last July.

"...we want to give back to the Chengdu Children’s Welfare Institute in return for the precious gift they gave given us in Jack. Nothing could come near to giving the orphanage what they gave us ..."

What resulted from our generous families' and friends' hearts was 37 pounds of clothing! All those clothes are now in three boxes on their way to Chengdu!

Thank you, dear friends! We will never forget your thoughtfulness! Ahhhh, to think of the smiles when these packages are opened!

October pictures

Mid-Autumn Moon Festival with Jack in full Chinese garb!

Chhaya and Jack sharing a Moon Pie and looking for Daddy's ship.

Jack enjoying his birthday cake.

Pumpkins and Wheelbarrow

Strong boy!

Jack had surgery this morning and is napping now. Let me just say he was making me soooo nervous when we got home from the hospital because he wouldn't stop running and jumping and climbing. Obviously, all went very well; so much for anesthesia jelly legs! Also, get this: he weighed in between 27 and 28 lbs and measured about 34 inches! Two and a half months ago, he weighed 23 lbs 8 oz and measured 32 inches. I allow for some error in measurement, but still, that's a lot of growth!

Here's a picture that Carol (who we thank so much for being here) took of us in the recovery room:

Whirlwind, Part 3 - Meeting Granny

And then, lucky enough to overlap with Grandma and Pop Pop's visit, Nai Nai returned to visit and brought along a very special person: Granny!!! (Jack's great grandma)
Jack thoroughly enjoyed showing Granny how many words he knew and how much he could eat and eat and eat. And when he was through with that, he would take off with Granny's cane across the yard. What patience Granny has! We can't wait to see you again soon.

Whirlwind Part 2, - Grandma and Pop Pop

After the Gumble cousins visited and we went to my brother and sister's house for the Welcome Jack party, my parents came to visit for the week! We prepped Jack by telling him that Grandma would say to him, "Good boy, Jack!" and Pop would say, "Hey you!" in a gruffy voice. Jack sure caught on to mimicking "Hey you" in his own gruffy voice.

We enjoyed a trip to the botanical garden where Jack took the opportunity to identify facial features on Pop Pop. Pop Pop now wears an eye patch. (Just kidding.)

There were lots of giggles with Pop Pop! And Jack latched on to how Grandma's little piggy goes "wee, wee, wee" all the way home.

As their plane home flew over our house, Jack blew a big kiss up into the sky. Awwwwww.

Whirlwind, Part 1

It's been a whirlwind the past few weeks, and here's Part 1:

Cousins Lauren and Dave and their daughter, Hailey, arrive with a climber slide for Jack! He can climb up it himself, exclaim he is up on top, and slide down - head first, too! They also brought a bajillion puzzles and books and -- most exciting for Chris and me -- gave us the gift of a date night out!!

Hailey loves her baby cousin Jack and has been reported to have cried twice since leaving because she misses him.

Then we whisked off to a "Welcome to the Family, Jack" party in Richmond where Jack did stunningly well meeting... let me count... 18 members of my family from as far North as Allentown, PA, to as far South as Columbia, SC. Carol and Mike, my sister-in-law and brother, ALWAYS throw an excellent party, and I think this one topped them all! We can't thank them enough! Below Jack shows a custom frame made by cousin Jill. Too cool!

Who can go without having "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" book in their collection?


My last post referenced the next (this) post as being titled "He poops", and I will spare you the details of Jack's first diaper leakage -- while napping. All I will say is that I am thankful for Lauren's command to me, "Take him into the shower!" Also will spare you Jack tearing off his shorts to try on new ones from Aunt JoAnne and Uncle Joe.

Whirlwind, Part II coming as soon as I download the pictures off the camera.

He eats, he...

Oh yes, Jack's an excellent eater. He must have gained at least 2 lbs over the past two months.

He gets jiggy with it. On Daddy's truck bed, no less.

He draws. Here's one of his drawings from the first week at school.

Stand by for next post: "He poops, he..."

A visit from Grandma Joyce

Grandma Joyce visited this past weekend -- and brought a bag FULL of goodies! Jack's favorites seem to be the teddy bear cookies and the "big truck" (words which Jack says many, many times a day undoubtedly tied to the fact that Daddy has a big truck). We all had lots of fun playing, eating, and watching jack swim.

It was a bittersweet visit without the physical presence of Chris's dad, but I could feel him smiling down on all of us, giddy with excitement at Jack's silliness.

Just hang in there, the rest of the NC family, you will meet Jack soon! Until then, enjoy Jack through the pictures and videos that Grandma Joyce took while she was here with us.

Meeting Cousins

This weekend, Jack got to meet his cousin, Jill, her husband, Chris, and their son (Jack's "second" cousin? Cousin "once removed"?), Nathan. Nathan will be three in December.

Nathan was so sweet to Jack! He shared his pine cones that he found in the botanical gardens and showed Jack how to open a present from Chris's parents.

Random pics for your pleasure

Daddy and Jack after and during their hair cuts a few weeks ago. Yes, that's right, we took him for a trim, courtesy of our friend Natalie, soon after we arrived home.

Who's idea was it to give this boy so much sugar?!?! He is eating a cake topping saved from a baby shower given by my friend Margaret.
Riding on his new horsey from another friend named Margaret. He's learning to swing his leg over to hop on like a real cowboy!
I believe 21 months of age is far, far too young to be given carte blanche with chalk. Note the chalk around his mouth, too. If you could see his teeth, they would be blue, too. Speaking of teeth, he is cutting his first "US tooth" - it's number nine for his mouth.

First Day at the Beach for Jack

Yesterday morning we took Jack to the beach at the bay. Surely it must have been his very first time at the beach, right?!?

At first he was hesitant about walking in the sand, but it only took him a few seconds to get into the swing of it. He enjoyed being in the water, of course - as he is half fish, and quickly became content shoveling sand into his bucket and watching seagulls.

Daddy-O chills with Jack:

"What up, Daddy-O?!? Keep your sand on your own side!!"

Presents and a pic for Ye Ye

Here's Jack with his first set of cars from Wei and family!
And here's Jack with his first desk from the Ludwigs! So studious!

This one is for Ye Ye (Chris's father who passed away earlier this year). Ye Ye was a huge UNC Tarheel fan, and Jack is practicing his layout with this UNC ball!

Nai Nai is in town!

Nai Nai came to visit on Thursday. Nai Nai is the Chinese word for paternal grandmother. It isn't enough to say that Jack loves his Nai Nai.. Nai Nai ADORES and LOVES her grandson, too! Here is a picture of the introduction:


Jack may be looking a little woozy in the above picture, but that's because he had doctors' appointments that morning. And would you look at the smile on Nai Nai's face?! If you could hear her laugh when she hears Jack's laugh - it is GREAT, infectious! Nai Nai thinks Jack is awesome and super smart, and that is not a biased opinion.

What is that saying? That grandparents are there to spoil the child? Well... Jack now has the coolest red wagon - with room for two (don't get any ideas Nai Nai)! It is really an awesome gift, and we know Jack is very familiar with riding in wagons in the orphanage in Chengdu. Plus, Jack got lots of hugs and kisses from Nai Nai, too!

We have really enjoyed Nai Nai's visit and will miss her when she leaves. But Skype provided a great way to introduce her to Jack and will continue to be a favorite way to keep in touch until we see each other in person again. And Granny, we missed seeing you and are happy you are doing well!

There's truth in those recommendations

The adoption literature recommends that the few few weeks at home with your child be low key with no big parties or too many events lest you welcome sleep and attachment problems. I've seen the truth in that. Although Jack seemed to enjoy his trip to Hooters on Thursday night (Chris has the pics on his FB Photos) and a picnic and swimming yesterday (man, does he love swimming - he even went down a slide on his own several times), the past two nights his sleeping has been quite fitful with tossing and whimpering. I think Chris has been able to sleep through most of it though, thankfully!

Today we take our poop in to the doctor's office. I can't say that I will miss scooping the poop. And after all, there's always dog poop to scoop. Speaking of the dogs, Jack, Maxine, and Daisy have been getting along just fine. Jack isn't scared of the dogs, but he doesn't mess with them either (except to put pots in their water bowl and knock it over). He's reached out to touch them a few times, but without sustained interest. His lack of interest in the dogs seems to parallel his lack of interest in stuffed animals/toys.

We are establishing a routine, which other mothers have told me is the key to happiness: wake, stretch, get dressed, have breakfast, go for a walk with Daisy, playtime, lunch, play briefly in his bedroom, read a few books in our room, nap (his crib is in our room), then wake and snack. The after lunch routine is still being figured out, but dinner is to be served by 5:30 or else we have a bit-o-monster on our hands.

We love reading the comments that friends and family have posted on the blog! Thank you so very much!

Yay! Doctor!

Jack actually liked (read: tolerated very well) the doctor with the exception of the stethescope. Chris and I love the doctor. Dr. Mitchell has a sub-speciality in international adoption, and he reviewed Jack Yiyun's files when we first considered adopting him.

Jack is still weighing in at 22.4 lbs which is at a lower percentile than those for his height and noggin, so the doctor recommended that his drinks be Pediasure, and that we continue to feed him the regular food we've been giving him. The doctor also said to keep him greased up with cream to prevent the itching and scratching. As proud parents, we were delighted to hear Jack is at the top in terms of his developmental ranking compared to what he's seen for other children that were adopted.

His vaccination records showed he was pretty good on shots, so prior to getting the titration results, he only needed two shots and a PPD test; we'll return to the office on Saturday morning to have that test read and to bring in the poop. Yes, multiple samples of poop. Oh please, like we all haven't taken poop samples before - if not for our kid, or our self, then for our dog or cat, right? Don't lie.

Then we went off for a bunch-o-lab work; mainly gallons of blood plus some. The main point here is that Jack didn't fight it too hard and even though he wailed and cried, within 15 feet of leaving the lab room, he was smiling and waving goodby to the technicians.

Now mommy is smiling because it is nap time.

Goodness! Where does the time go?

With a toddler, apparently it goes to following them around the house, tickling, swinging, a very little bit of coloring, reading animal sound books, walks around the neighborhood and to parks, listening to chit chat and singing, feeding, feeding, changing diapers, and changing diapers.

We've been doing really wonderful. Jack is absolutely incredible and amazes us so very often with his words and actions: from dada, mama, more, please, cracker, bottle (ok, so maybe only mom and dad can fully understand what he's saying) to mimicking noises (mostly bodily and dog barking) and facial expressions (big smiles and squinting eyes) and sharing his food. He also amazes us with his appetite!

We went shopping the other morning for some smaller clothes for him - 12-month sized! I don't think it will be long until he isn't losing his 18-month-sized pants.

Chris and I are fairly tired, of course. And so, goodnight!

A Different Perspective

As you read this story below, you will see how the wife represents Jack Yiyun.

Imagine for a moment…
You have met the person you’ve dreamed about all your life. He has every quality that you desire in a spouse. You plan for the wedding, enjoying every free moment with your fiancée. You love his touch, his smell, the way he looks into your eyes. For the first time in your life, you understand what is meant by “soul mate,” for this person understands you in a way that no one else does. Your heart beats in rhythm with his. Your emotions are intimately tied to his every joy, his every sorrow.

The wedding comes. It is a happy celebration, but the best part is that you are finally the wife of this wonderful man. You fall asleep that night, exhausted from the day’s events, but relaxed and joyful in the knowledge that you are next to the person who loves you more than anyone in the world…the person who will be with you for the rest of your life. The next morning you wake up, nestled in your partner’s arms. You open your eyes and immediately look for his face. But it’s not him! You are in the arms of another man. You recoil in horror. Who is this man?

Where is your beloved?
You ask questions of the new man, but it quickly becomes apparent that he doesn’t understand you. You search every room in the house, calling and calling for your husband. The new guy follows you around, trying to hug you, pat you on the back. . .even trying to stroke your arm, acting like everything is okay. But you know that nothing is okay. Your beloved is gone. Where is he? Will he return? When? What has happened to him? Weeks pass. You cry and cry over the loss of your beloved. Sometimes you ache silently, in shock over what has happened. The new guy tries to comfort you. You appreciate his attempts, but he doesn’t speak your language-either verbally or emotionally. He doesn’t seem to realize the terrible thing that has happened...that your sweetheart is gone.

You find it difficult to sleep. The new guy tries to comfort you at bedtime with soft words and gentle touches, but you avoid him, preferring to sleep alone, away from him and any intimate words or contact. Months later, you still ache for your beloved, but gradually you are learning to trust this new guy. He’s finally learned that you like your coffee black, not doctored up with cream and sugar. Although you still don’t understand his bedtime songs, you like the lilt of his voice and take some comfort in it. More time passes. One morning, you wake up to find a full suitcase sitting next to the front door. You try to ask him about it, but he just takes you by the hand and leads you to the car. You drive and drive and drive. Nothing is familiar. Where are you? Where is he taking you?

You pull up to a large building. He leads you to an elevator and up to a room filled with people. Many are crying. Some are ecstatic with joy. You are confused. And worried. The man leads you over to the corner. Another man opens his arms and sweeps you up in an embrace. He rubs your back and kisses your cheeks, obviously thrilled to see you. You are anything but thrilled to see him. Who in the world is he? Where is your beloved? You reach for the man who brought you, but he just smiles (although he seems to be tearing up, which concerns you), pats you on the back, and puts your hand in the hands of the new guy. The new guy picks up your suitcase and leads you to the door. The familiar face starts openly crying, waving and waving as the elevator doors close on you and the new guy. The new guy drives you to an airport and you follow him, not knowing what else to do. Sometimes you cry, but then the new guy tries to make you smile, so you grin back, wanting to “get along.” You board a plane. The flight is long. You sleep a lot, wanting to mentally escape from the situation.

Hours later, the plane touches down. The new guy is very excited and leads you into the airport where dozens of people are there to greet you. Light bulbs flash as your photo is taken again and again. The new guy takes you to another guy who hugs you. Who is this one? You smile at him. Then you are taken to another man who pats your back and kisses your cheek. Then yet another fellow gives you a big hug and messes your hair. Finally, someone (which guy is this?) pulls you into his arms with the biggest hug you’ve ever had. He kisses you all over your cheeks and croons to you in some language you’ve never heard before.

He leads you to a car and drives you to another location. Everything here looks different. The climate is not what you’re used to. The smells are strange. Nothing tastes familiar, except for the black coffee. You wonder if someone told him that you like your coffee black. You find it nearly impossible to sleep. Sometimes you lie in bed for hours, staring into the blackness, furious with your husband for leaving you, yet aching from the loss. The new guy checks on you. He seems concerned and tries to comfort you with soft words and a mug of warm milk. You turn away, pretending to go to asleep.

People come to the house. You can feel the anxiety start to bubble over as you look into the faces of all the new people. You tightly grasp the new guy’s hand. He pulls you closer. People smile and nudge one other, marveling at how quickly you’ve fallen in love. Strangers reach for you, wanting to be a part of the happiness. Each time a man hugs you, you wonder if he will be the one to take you away. Just in case, you keep your suitcase packed and ready. Although the man at this house is nice and you’re hanging on for dear life, you’ve learned from experience that men come and go, so you just wait in expectation for the next one to come along.

Each morning, the new guy hands you a cup of coffee and looks at you expectantly. A couple of times the pain and anger for your husband is so great that you lash out, sending hot coffee across the room, causing the new guy to yelp in pain. He just looks at you, bewildered. But most of the time you calmly take the cup. You give him a smile. And wait. And wait. And wait.

How would each of us handle all these changes?

How would this impact us for the rest of our lives?

©2006 Cynthia Hockman-Chupp. Cynthia is an adoptive parent, teacher, and writer who has learned the most about parenting from her children. She operates a website with Heidi Louella, another adoptive parent and teacher, called http://www.a4everfamily.org/ with great information for families that are dealing with the challenges of attachment in young children.
Her analogy is courtesy of Dr. Kali Miller, an attachment therapist.

The bonding among the three of us is an extremely important part of Jack Yiyun’s development and our growth as a family. As his parents, Chris and I are responsible for creating a safe place for Jack Yiyun, so that when it's time for him to meet his new extended family, he'll feel secure through and through.

We love all of you and can't wait for all of us to get to know each other. But please be patient as we welcome Jack Yiyun as our son with all the time and care he needs.

Kids say the darndest - and sweetest - things!

Here's a card from the three boys of a dear friend's dear friend. These kids have given up the stuffed Elmo that each of them, now ranging from 4 through 9 years old, carried around with them as toddlers. They have also parted ways with books, toys, and clothing for Jack Yiyun along with giving him this heartfelt welcome. Thanks Oscar, Charles and Marcus! A bow and a wink to your parents, too!

What's in a Chinese name?

Above is Yiyun's name in Chinese as it is printed on his paperwork. Below are the three above characters translated into pinyin ("spell sound"). The number after each pinyin word is the tone used when pronouncing the word. A 2 is a rising tone from low to high, and a 4 is a falling tone from high to low.

Liu2 - a popular last name
Yi4 - skill, art
Yun4 - fortune, luck, fate; to move; to transport; to use; to apply

A good friend has speculated that the whole name might mean to have artistic luck or fate. Another good friend thinks maybe the name-giver was thinking about the Olympics when naming him Yiyun; he was born in 2008, when the Olympic were held in Beijing. Apparently quite a few people in China gave Olympic-related names to their children born in 2008.